I know everyone is sick of hearing about the dreaded ‘C’ word but let’s be honest we can all learn a lot from when things don’t go exactly to plan. And although our first instinct is to panic or even have a complete meltdown, what is more important is to have a healthy state of mind and try to enjoy the journey, and don’t forget when life gives us lemons let’s make lemonade.
Here’s our top tips-
1. Count Your Blessings
Try to stop sweating over the things that are out of our control because you’re only hurting yourself. Remember how blessed you are and what you already have to be grateful for, a useful way of doing this is to write it down, it really does have an amazing impact on your mood. If you have had to do the dreaded thing of postposing your big day, remember you’ve found your one and how lucky you are to have found someone you love.
Photograph by Jane Beadnall Photography
2. Focus On What You Can Control
If possible, don’t react immediately to whatever is happening, instead practice patience and collect as much information as possible. This perspective will help you remain less emotional and improve your ability to make good decisions. Also clarify your goals, focus on the purpose, and control what you can, it will help ditch the stress. And if you are finding it hard to get excited, try to turn your focus to the future.
Photograph by Jo Lawrence Photography
Continue to dream big, do not censor your dreams, continue to visualise and plan for your dream day. If you are struggling with staying positive, find the certainty in the uncertain, overcoming the uncertainty is half the battle, you will almost certainly feel a sense of relief come over you when the decision to postpone has been made, and then you can start to love your Plan B as much as plan A.
4. Keep an Open Mind
Your thoughts are powerful when stressful situations occur, your mind may go in a thousand directions and some of your thoughts are likely to be negative. The more you allow your mind to wander, the more difficult it will be for you to stay calm. Stop yourself from imagining the worst-case scenario, instead let go of any negative thoughts and refocus your mind on something positive, no matter how small.
5. Talk about it
Use your support system and do not be afraid to ask for advice from someone who isn’t emotionally invested in the situation, it will help see the dilemma from a different perspective. When you reach out to people you trust and respect, you will feel more grounded, which will help you control your stress levels. When you explain the situation, it may prompt you to discover a new approach or find a solution.
Talking about it will also help you to understand that you are not alone, this rather uncomfortable situation is something which we are all uncomfortable with together, let’s spread the load rather than some finding themselves on top and other at the bottom.
6. Stop and Smell the Roses
The next time you are faced with a stressful situation, stop what you are doing for a minute and perform the following steps:
• Take some big deep breaths
• Imagine you are smelling the roses with each inhale
• Imagine all the stress leaving your body with each exhale
• Body scan – identify any areas that are tight or tense, clenched jaw, rounded shoulders, or anywhere else that has any tension.
7. Operate from Your Higher Self
Take care of your body, if you make your personal health a priority, you will be better equipped to handle a crisis. Be mindful to eat a balanced diet, drink water, exercise regularly and get plenty of sleep. By improving your health, you will increase your self-control, memory, and emotional intelligence, which will help you respond well to an emergency. Also stop demanding perfection from yourself, it will only stress you out because it is just not reality.
8. Energy is Contagious
At the end of the day, negative energy, (like a virus) is contagious, it only takes one person to ruin your day. All we can do is try our best to seek out positivity in uncertain times, so protect yourself and your close ones, and do not be a mood hoover, just try to have a positive outlook on a negative situation. Staying positive when you have had to postpone your wedding is never going to be an easy task, all you can do is try and find the silver linings, choose to look on the bright side. And remember, Plan B is not worse than Plan A, it’s just a different plan.
Love Sarah x
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